opçoes “sempre há uma soluçao” – certo ou errado??
A vida é uma opção…. Alguém um dia me mandou um e-mail com alguns pensamentos, onde ele perguntava se existia amor eterno, se jurar á alguém amor eterno estava certo, se existia uma pessoa para você o resto da vida…. Ele tinha uma dúvida grande se deixaria a família por não sentir o mesmo amor pela companheira como antes, por sentir este amor talvez por outra pessoa… Por outro lado ele não conseguia imaginar acordar de manhã e não ter os filhos na mesa do café da manhã, não compartilhar o dia a dia com eles… Com a decisão tomada de seguir a vida com a companheira, que amava como amiga e manter-se ao lado dos filhos, uma opção foi posta de lado, encontrar uma companheira que poderia amar, ter mais filhos e continuar amar os filhos da primeira companheira como muitos pais fazem… Certo ou errado ?! Nem certo nem errado…. Errado ou certo só o futuro saberá e dirá e dependerá apenas de uma pessoa, dele próprio… Qualquer opção que tomamos na vida estará certa se nos sentirmos bem com ela, e não nos arrependermos de não termos tomado o outro caminho. Qualquer pessoa que optar por seguir a segunda linha de vida; tomar decisões e depois perguntar-se se a outra decisão seria melhor e não ser capaz de ter certeza que a decisão tomada foi certa naquela hora, não será capaz de tomar nenhuma decisão na vida que o fará feliz, e assim fará infeliz todos aqueles ao seu redor… Tantas perguntas nos reodeiam ao caminharmos pela vida, será que devo ir á essa festa, será que devo usar este vestido, será que devo ligar para meu namorado ou esperar, será de devo comprar o carro á vista ou financiar, será que devo aceitar a nova proposta de emprego e deixar todos meus colegas ? Será que devo aceitar o pedido de casamento e prometer ficar para sempre com essa pessoa ??????? Todas respostas têm ao menos duas opções, e a beleza de nossa vida é exatamente a exstência dessas opções, se não tivessemos opções e fossemos obrigados a fazer algo, então sim teriamos vidas miseráveis… Então como ter certeza de que tomaremos as decisões certas ???? …Saberemos, apenas saberemos… simplesmente por que se não nos sentirmos bem, se sentirmos que nossa vida não está indo no caminho esperado e que nos traz paz e felicidade, simplesmente a outra opção ainda estará lá e podemos sempre tentar de novo e voltar atrás… Se o resultado será o mesmo, nunca saberemos, mas o segredo de tomar uma decisão que tem mais chances de dar certo, é apenar confiar que, estamos fazendo o que achamos certo para aquele momento e que SEMPRE teremos mais opções caso o resultado não seja o esperado !!! Por isso, ao deparar-se com uma decisão difícil… Sorria, agradeça pela decisão estar nas tuas mãos, faça qualquer coisa que seja que te dê paz respire fundo e lembre-se que SEMPRE existirá outra estrada a ser tomada caso haja muitos buracos na estrada escolhida. Sinta-se em paz e tome a decisão e não olhe para trás, por que a partir deste momento com a decisão tomada, nada será como você imagina sempre será um pouco diferente, então o que adianta olhar para trás e tentar adivinhar o que seria se… ????? :o)
Peace Kit – 5th part – Beautiful World – Already In existence
Beautiful World – Already In existence This CD, as other books, I had found by coincidence in the Amazon and had ordered just because the idea was attractive, but then this music had awe me…. The CD tell about a beautiful world already in existence, and the music “I know” is exactly my belief – I know that everything will be ok and I believe that the sun will shine again one day! http://www.amazon.com/In-Existence-Beautiful-World/dp/B000003MVX/ref=sr_1_1?s=music&ie=UTF8&qid=1339984848&sr=1-1&keywords=beautiful+world+in+existence The lyrics: I know How will I know, the sun is gonna shine again next day I can reach you when you so far away I know because my heart tells me so How will I know, the smile behind your eyes is for real I can touch you, and know what you feel I know because my heart tells me so There is so much energy, enough for every one Deeper than the conscious mind, silent knowledge, wisdom we all share Oh I know, I know, I know, I know, I know because my heart tells me so How will I know that I will have the strength to go on When all hope is gone I know because my heart tells me so How will I know that peace will come one day That people can live in harmony I know because my heart tells me so I believe in days to come, people will be free I believe one day we’ll see, everybody living life as one
Reverência ao Destino “Destiny Reverence” – my favourite poem!!!
Reverência ao Destino “Destiny Reverence” Carlos Drummond de Andrade Falar é completamente fácil , quando se têm palavras em mente que expressem sua opinião. To speak is completely easy, when one has words in his mind that express his opinion. Difícil é expressar por gestos e atitudes o que realmente queremos dizer, o quanto queremos dizer, antes que a pessoa se vá. Difficult is to express through gestures and attitudes what we really want to tell, how much we want to tell, before the person is gone. Fácil é julgar pessoas que estão sendo expostas pelas circunstâncias. Easy is to judge the people who are exposed by the circumstances. Difícil é encontrar e refletir sobre os seus erros, ou tentar fazer diferente algo que já fez muito errado. Difficult is to find and reflect about your own mistakes, or to try to do differently something that you have already done very wrong. Fácil é ser colega , fazer companhia a alguém , dizer o que ele deseja ouvir. Easy is to be colleagues, keep somebody company, tell him/her what he/she wants to hear. Difícil é ser amigo para todas as horas e dizer sempre a verdade quando for preciso. E com confiança no que diz. Difficult is to be friends for all times and to tell always the truth when it is necessary. And with confidence on what you are telling. Fácil é analisar a situação alheia e poder aconselhar sobre esta situação. Easy is to analyze the other person’s situation and be able to advice this situation. Difícil é vivenciar esta situação e saber o que fazer. Ou ter coragem pra fazer. Difficult is to live this situation and know what to do. Or, to have the courage to do it. Fácil é demonstrar raiva e impaciência quando algo o deixa irritado. Easy is to demonstrate anger and impatience when something makes you irritated. Difícil é expressar o seu amor a alguém que realmente te conhece, te respeita e te entende. E é assim que perdemos pessoas especiais. Difficult is to express your love to someone who really recognises you, respects you and understands you. …And this is how we loose special people. Fácil é mentir aos quatro ventos o que tentamos camuflar. Easy is to lie to everybody what we try to camouflage, to hide. Difícil é mentir para o nosso coração. Difficult is to lie to our heart. Fácil é ver o que queremos enxergar. Easy is to see what we want to see. Difícil é saber que nos iludimos com o que achávamos ter visto. Admitir que nos deixamos levar, mais uma vez, isso é difícil. Difficult is to know that we mislead ourselves with what we believe we have seen. To admit that we were taken by the situation, again one more time, this is difficult. Fácil é dizer “oi” ou “como vai?” Easy is to say “hi” or “how are you?” Difícil é dizer “adeus”. Principalmente quando somos culpados pela partida de alguém de nossas vidas… Difficult is to say “Good bye”. Mainly when we can be blamed for the departure of someone from our lives… Fácil é abraçar , apertar as mãos , beijar de olhos fechados… Easy is to hug, to shake hands, kiss with closed eyes… Difícil é sentir a energia que é transmitida. Aquela que toma conta do corpo como uma corrente elétrica quando tocamos a pessoa certa. Difficult is to feel the energy that is exchanged. The one that takes your body like an electricity chain when the right person is touched. Fácil é querer ser amado. Easy is to want to be loved. Difícil é amar completamente só. Amar de verdade, sem ter medo de viver, sem ter medo do depois. Amar e se entregar. E aprender a dar valor somente a quem te ama. Difficult is to love completely alone. Truly love, without fear of living, without fear from what is next. Love and give yourself. And learn to give value only to who loves you. Fácil é ouvir a música que toca. Easy is to listen to the music that touches. Difícil é ouvir a sua consciência. Acenando o tempo todo, mostrando nossas escolhas erradas. Difficult is to listen to your conscious. Signalizing you all the time, showing our wrong choices. Fácil é ditar regras. Easy is to dictate the rules. Difícil é seguí-las. Ter a noção exata de nossas próprias vidas, ao invés de ter noção das vidas dos outros. Difficult is to follow them. To have the right notion of our own lives, instead of having notion of others’ lives. Fácil é perguntar o que deseja saber. Easy is to ask what you want to know. Difícil é estar preparado para escutar esta resposta. Ou querer entender a resposta. Difficult is to be prepared to listen to this answer. Or to want to understand the answer. Fácil é chorar ou sorrir quando der vontade. Easy is to cry or to smile when you feel like. Difícil é sorrir com vontade de chorar ou chorar de rir, de alegria. Difficult is to smile when you want to cry, or to cry of laughing, from happiness. Fácil é dar um beijo. Easy is to give a kiss. Difícil é entregar a alma. Sinceramente, por inteiro. Difficult is to give your soul. Sincerely, as a whole. Fácil é sair com várias pessoas ao longo da vida. Easy is to go out with several people along your life. Difícil é entender que pouquíssimas delas vão te aceitar e te enxergar como você realmente é e te fazer feliz por inteiro. Difficult is to understand that very little of them will accept you as you truly, really are and make you happy, entirely. Fácil é ocupar um lugar na caderneta telefônica. Easy is to occupy a space in a phone book. Difícil é ocupar o coração de alguém. Saber que se é realmente amado. Difficult is to occupy someone’s heart. To know that you are really loved. Fácil
Peace kit 2nd part – I have shared these with many people, now easier to do it!
Right after my mother’s passing, I was a totally lost, I have missed the only person to talk to about everything. But mostly about existence, about life, death and whatever is between or within them… After her passing, I brought to Hungary a movie that my mother wanted her kids to watch, which was a journey to quantum physics, spirituality, science and religion at the same time. I had never watched it, and on a phone call, my brother had told me that he had already watched it more than 5 times, and that he was getting the message of our mother… I then decided to watch it. On a Saturday afternoon, after my weekly massage and “treat” to myself, I arrived home and jumped into a comfortable pajama, prepared some snacks and started to watch it… I could not believe myself – the film was simply a summary of most of my beliefs and my talks to my mom, it was describing many things at once, and simply from different sides… The film was “What the bleep do we know?” What the bleep do we know? http://www.whatthebleep.com/whatthebleep/ – this film had some insights that were very important for my life from there on (2006 May). Some of them: 1) Positive thoughts to bring us a great life; my whole life my mother had told us that whatever happens we should see the positive side of it and we should spread the positivism throughout the world – and if we would do so, the world around us would be blessed, and nothing could be totally bad… In the film, there is a very important scientific proof of this. The research on influence of thoughts, positivism, negativism or whatever feeling on crystallization of molecules of water from Emoto Masaru – it did prove that our thoughts influence molecules of water, and our body is 75% water, so whatever we think will firstly impact ourselves. The old story that whatever you send you get back, indeed is whatever you feel about others, whatever the intention you send, is firstly affecting you, because it goes THROUGH you!!!! 2) We are able to access much more information than we normally receive, if we are aware. The amount of information that really exists around us is much bigger than what we usually “absorb”, but there is always a way to widen this “lenses”. Let us put this way: When you see a film, you see only what the lenses had recorded, but all beyond the film scenario appearing in your screen, there are lots, huge amount of different things that are not recorded, they do not get to you, imagine that your eyes are the same – what about what is happening around you and you are not seeing???? …Well there were lots more in the film, and it is really worth to watch, this is a life changer… Do it, for you and for the world!! Bless you! Lara
Torta de banana / maca – de preguiconcia
Torta da Preguiça
Los Roques
Cayo agua, the most interesting island and it really deserve a visit – the paradise is here Los Roques is a paradise, it is an ideal place for a perfect holiday and a big rest for those who want to clean the soul. …but, one need to have all the patience in the world, need to go there with a free spirit and really need to be prepared for all the set backs one can have at a holiday – and need to be sure that all planned is really planned… We have bought a nice package for the “posada” and the airplane tickets, we were planning this trip for more than 2 months, 13 friends, among them my pregnant sister with her baby of 1,5 years… …and how nice it was to arrive to the pousada “La Laguna” with the vouchers from the Explorerpartner.com and hear from the owner of the posada that they have never received this reservation neither payment for the days planned (we had paid 100% the trip in advance). Calling the agency, they have spent the day looking for the reservations – it turned to be that they were cheated – a venezuelan girl, Carolina, who worked some time ago for the La Laguna had mislead the agency and the posada La Laguna and had told them that she was the one who was responsible for doing the reservations – finally she had reserved pousadas on a much lower price level and had kept the money for her – what a nice start in Venezuela. Finally my friends were able to stay, some of them at a better pousada, since they did not enter the reserved one and paid themselves a better one (which was far away from a luxurious spa in tahiti and others at a not so good one, to say so) but my husband, myself, my sister and her family, instead of staying from the 26th of December until the 7th of January, we had to come back to Caracas on the 30th of December… Still pending to check how to receive reimbursement for the the payment made… Well, but to go to Los Roques – Be prepared to; – Daily lack of energy – during this holidays, each second day our “pousada” did not have energy – meaning, no air conditioning, and depending on the posada where you stay, you would have candle night… – Lack of Water – some of the posadas had problem with water – at the majority you will be “monitored” not to have 2 showers a day – you might get an angry manager shouting at your door – NO HOT WATER AT ALL – the island has a policy of no warm water for the showers – indeed the weather is so nice that, unless you decide to shower very late at night, this will not be a problem – Lots of garbage and mosquitos all around the Gran Roques. Unfortunately the island is not well preserved, and very close to one of the most expensive Pousadas, and the only one at the beach, literally door at the sand – Caracol – there is a huge dam with lots of garbage, which smells a lot… – Take with you anything to keep all the mosquitos far away from you, being at the main island or the others, during the day or night. All the set backs apart, here are some of the nice tips and good experience there in Los Roques: 1) Pousadas: You have to go to some expensive ones; Posada La Laguna is a nice one, is not among the high priced ones, is a simple one, very nice one, and its main attraction is the owner, Mavi (Maria Victoria – an Italian – journalist who decided to move to Los Roques 4 years ago and is running herself the pousada wiht the help of her daughter and her son – Italians from Rome) and her daughter, Sveva. This is one of the only posadas with capacity for more than 20 people at once. When we arrived there, with the vouchers and no real reservation, they offered us rooms for us to change and to go to the beach, they accommodated the reservations in order to have place for us that night in case we would not find anything – contacted us somebody so we could go for the daily boat trip – and by the end of the day, after using her rooms, we left to the reserved posadas and she did not charged us anything – Finally my sister stayed there for the remaining days. Mavi and Sveva were basically running the posada alone, only with 1 young lady helping them – They do deserve my respect! Posada Los Corales is a tiny little posada, with all the charm one posada can have! It is managed, owned, by Jesus and his wife. Our friends Carol and Rafa stayed their, and the meals attracted so much them that by the end, the group ate there for 3 nights. They have only 4 rooms, you have just to take care not to choose the room which is located beside the generator, since the noise might keep you awake! The price here during the high season was BsF 840,00 around US$98,00 per person half pension. Posada Galapagos is among the best ones (the price per person per night – high season, half pension, is US$ 150,00, meaning – couple US$ 300,00 – I have never paid so high price for any hotel in Europe, even when I wanted to treat myself…). If you try to save some money, you might have so many headaches that you can jeopardize your holiday. 2) The boat trip to know the islands – Normally the posadas have included 2 or 3 islands – the closest ones. For the rest you have to hire a boat, which will charge you, per person around BsF 160,00 for the cayo
Los Roques – little paradise in Venezuela
From each country that I have lived in, I have received a gift, from Venezuela it happened still during the first month arriving and getting to know the country. Los Roques is an archipelago with around 350 islands, cays, the main island, Gran Roques, is where all “posadas” are located, with some restaurants (not the ones we are used to) and some bakeries where we can find beers, bread and “chucherias” (snacks). The charm of the trip is to hire the boats that will take you to whole day trips to the cays, the most beautiful being also the furthest – the Cayo de Agua – it is wonderful and the only island where you can find potable water. The “posadas” are not even close to being the charming ones, there is not enough water or energy, meaning that even if your hotel is with air conditioning, you might find yourself having each second night without it, since it can be your side of the island day of saving energy! Despite of the difficulties – we have commented that in any other place, this would be a touristic place, paradise with all comfort for the foreigners, instead of a foreigner repellent for its lack of care – you forget everything when you wake up and go to the take your boat, and as the day goes by, you fell in love with this place, the water, the sea, the nature, all is enchanting…. I will post more tips of posadas and places to stay that might be worth! Ah – definitively do not use anything to do with an internet tourism agency called explorepartners – they had “cheated” on us selling certain posadas that were more expensive and sending us to ones that were just not bearable – better to call the posada yourself and be sure that you are indeed talking to the owners!!!
Change Management – avoiding changes, adapting to them or making them part of our lives; diffi
A very good lesson learned from my mother was to have the wisdom to do many things at the same time – not like multitasking – but rather having different interests, and then having the intuition to apply the knowledge learnt on all fields of our lives! Well, example, she used to work on a pathology lab, and always complained that, for cooking, she could never have the exact measures, then she started to buy “beckers” and other lab pots for measurement to cook – she found her precision on her kitchen, a kitchen which shelves looked more like as a lab !!!! Well, lesson learned – during turbulent times during my work, with mergers, acquisitions and many changes on the management I was having yoga classes, and as usual, I did not get enough of the classes and started to study a lot the philosophy and main concepts of yoga, and it turned to be the best thing to improve my professionalism and my leadership style! The main threat to any company or business is also what brings it to a higher level – the quick increase of business, coming along new rules, new people, new thoughts and new way of working – for the ones who are working well and successfully before this period, this means changes – that many times are perceived as negative… …And why this? – For a single reason, this might take them from their comfort zone, to do things differently and not to know if this will bring them the same success… Here comes the magic portion – “not knowing”…. This is the main reason for all the problems that bring us to have to manage the changes in order to deal with people’s suffering and then be successful in business… Let us come to Sanskrit – Wikipedia “Avidyā is a Sanskrit word that means “ignorance“, “delusion“, “unlearned”, “unwise” and that which is not, or runs counter to, vidya. (LB – Avidya is not knowing something – not intellectually, but just not knowing) What keeps humanity captive in Samsara is this avidya. (LB – what keeps people in earth and not going to the “next level” in Hinduism) This ignorance is not lack of erudition; it is ignorance about the nature of ‘Being’ (Sanskrit: Sat). It is a limitation that is natural to human sensory or intellectual apparatus. This is responsible for all the misery of humanity. Advaita Vedanta holds that the eradication of it should be humanity’s only goal and that will automatically mean Realisation of the Self (Sanskrit: atman). Root of suffering Avidyā plays a key role in Buddhism and Buddhist doctrine and is the primary cause of suffering in saṃsāra. Uprooting avidya The antidote to avidyā is “wisdom” (Skt.: prajñā; Pali: pañña). This is achieved by practicing awareness/mindfulness (Pali: sati, Skt: smṛti), patient endurance (Skt: kṣānti; Pali: khanti) and meditation (Skt: dhyāna), all three of which are incorporated in the pan-Buddhist practices of the Noble Eightfold Path and thepāramitās (“perfections”).” Simplifying all and using to our “Western” Style of life… The not knowing something will always bring to human being suffering, since when something new will come or is happening, the outcome will never be known, even if it can be good, we tend to fear it, we’d rather keep the not so good known than to accept the not known… In actual times, when all the speed is increasing and evolution and development of business is essential, bringing the concept to our organizations that Avidya should be worked through can be the easiest solution; Let us put this way – it is important to clarify with the organizations that not knowing what will happen might not be bad, if there is something that we do not know, then we should practice the full awareness of this and just concentrate on what we do know and what we can influence in order to bring our knowledge and expertise as part of the successful outcome! There will be thousands of aspects in our lives that we will not know for sure, but if we concentrate on these points, we will be paralyzed, as our business will be – the best is to accept that changes are main part of evolution and development and will always bring something very good to us all – so let us be part of this so we can enjoy the successful outcome, rather than be against and then see the success from outside, not being part of it!! Avidya – not knowing – the biggest cause of suffering in the world – but also the key to our freedom and realization, through Avidya we can learn to go through “Samsara”, common lives and world, to a superb life and world – where success with peace is just part of it!!!
Leadership and coaching – who indeed learns during a training?
After many years without training myself the colleagues, I had the opportunity to work on a coaching training myself, I had spent a full Saturday reviewing old booklets, books, courses and the certification material of coach the coach. I had so much fun preparing the material and putting together exercises and fundamentals of coaching that I barely slept nights before the training, imaging how the reaction of the team would be – since I did put lots of love in the coaching workshop! Some points were so important for me to review, as the 4 abilities of a good coach: (From my training at http://www.coachinc.com/ccu/default.asp?s=1) 1) Contextual Listening Avoid deciding what you will say in response while the individual is still talking; Say what you heard to verify; Set aside your own agenda; avoid making quick assumptions! (“As you listen ask yourself, am I inhibiting, contaminating, or encouraging the other’s message?” – Sherod Miller) 2) Discovery Questioning Use neutral, non-judgmental language; know when to ask closed questions and when to ask open-ended questions; continue to listen and use silence effectively; ASK QUESTIONS TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL DISCOVER HIS OR HER OWN ANSWERS. 3) Messaging Convert your message on a neutral one – with a neutral language. Establish an environment that supports a good coaching mood. Allow the time for the message to be fully heard and understood! Really have an intention to move the coachee forward, do not focus on being a good coach and telling the right thing at the right moment – if you really support your coachee with love you will know! 4) Acknowledge Focused feedback to acknowledge, celebrate or endorse positive contributions, learning and behaviors. Be genuine and timely. Reframe the situation with respect. Become comfortable in being acknowledged – teach others to accept it. Create an environment of being valued and valuing others. This was only one part and one point, which I got inspired by the corporate coaching clinic, which I took while being coached by Penny: http://www.corpalc.com/index.html My conclusion of a good coach, hence, a good leader is: The best coach does not have the answer, does not give the answer, but indeed is the one that “inspires” the coachee to find his / her own answers!!! …and this works also for our private life! I will share with you how the workshop went !
Peace kit 1st part – I have shared these with many people, now easier to do it!
There are some books, musics, places that are part of our life transformation, some “kitsch”, some meaningful, but for each one of us, they mean differently. In my life, there are many circumstances that have changed me, or that have changed my way of seeing the world, and they have set the path on which my life is nowadays going through… I can say that today I am much more mature, spiritually speaking, making myself a much calmer, happy and peaceful person, which does not mean that I do not have my moments, when I am spinning of and wanting to disappear or make some one do so, hihihi! Well, no more delays, here is the transformation 1st story! The first book that has changed me and has made great difference in my life, to see more the positive side to try not to over think things and to know that there is always a happy end, and as my mother used to tell, if you are still not happy, it means that the end did not arrive yet. 1) I was walking at a shopping center, after a terrible break up with a boy friend, I was really lost, I was at my first real nice job and I had to be better, but as always I could not do so… Window shopping was something that relaxed me, and walking through the window of a book store, a book fell from the place it was and I noticed its color, I entered then the store and while I was checking the books, a nice gentleman took a book, with the same colors from the one that I have seen falling – he then handed it to me commenting – “it really did something to me, you should take a look, in case you are not looking for something specific!”… Well, this was the book: Don’t sweat the small stuff – and it’s all small stuff (in portuguese “nao faca tempestade em um copo de agua”) http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Sweat-Small-Stuff-Its/dp/0786881852 Each chapter has a lesson, one can read it opening in the morning and then going through the day with this learning. I did it differently – I had post its blue and green and I was tagging the chapter according to the benefit that it would give me professionally or privately. One nice chapter tells us that our thoughts are the “kings” – they are the ones that make us feel bad or good, and in adapting – domesticating them, we would run our lives and be much happier, and it tells us to do an experiment, to think on something very very nice and to try to feel bad, angry…. try it – impossible!!!!! WOW – this was the beginning of my long travel to positive thoughts and how to calm down the mind and the life by keeping bad thoughts very distance!! (The ones familiar with Yoga will notice that this is the principle of Yoga – calm your mind, control it “Citta Vrtti Nirodah” in order to find peace – “Samadhi”) I have, since then, shared this book with many people, and one boss of mine gave this book as a Christmas gift for all the organization in Brazil and the same happened in Portugal – after this I probably shared this book with dozens of friends!! Everyone should have this book to check sometimes!! 🙂
